Jitters

After much anticipation, I have finally started my Grad School application. I though that starting the application would feel overwhelming but it has had quite the opposite effect. I literally have the jitters about it because I am so excited! Yes, it is possible that this could be from the hot mug of coffee I just downed but it is more likely from the excitement of the application. I have 3 of the 4 parts completed but the 3 that remain are the hardest. 

The biggest curiosity I had before starting my application was what the questions for the personal statement would be and I must say that immediately after reading them I had answers and examples come to mind for each one of them!

I feel very encouraged that I am looking to go in the right field for me because all of the prompts are so personal to me. I can't wait to continue working on my application but I am going to have to exercise a bit of self-control and hold off for a while because I have a pretty busy week with a paper due and an exam approaching. I have been spoiled thus far this semester with my lax schedule.

I promised an update on Fall Retreat so I will provide one that is very brief: 
It was a very fun and meaningful weekend. Great memories and friendships were made, prayers answered, and lives were impacted forever. I would post pictures but I forgot to bring my camera along. 

Another fun weekend is approaching to serve as a hiatus from this busy week. My parents are coming to visit me over fall break. I am most looking forward to my mom finally seeing my apartment! I am hoping to somehow find time to finish some decorating touches before they arrive on Friday. 

In joy and excitement, 
Kenz

P.S. How can dying leaves be so beautiful?

Forever Curious

"Don't only practice your art, 

But force your way into its secrets, 

For it and knowledge

Can raise men to the divine."

-Ludwig Van Beethoven

This is a quote that I can across recently and has really stuck with me. As most good quotes do, this one got me thinking about myself. For many years I have not considered myself to have “an art” or anything that I have obtained mastery over. I felt like everything I ever did was mediocre. School. Piano. Lacrosse. Hunting. Reading. Blogging. Fashion. Cooking. You name it, I can probably do it half-way. While it is nice that I am a well-rounded person, it is discouraging to not have one task that I can truly feel ownership of.

This has all been changing this year as I have been realizing the possibility that for the first time in my life I do have an art. Call it old-fashioned or something that grandmothers are supposed to do but I love knitting! I have been knitting since I was 12 years old and have tried to push my skills a little bit further with each project I have made. Knitting is my art. It makes me feel alive, creative, and purposeful. When applied to knitting, this quote spurs me on to constantly learn new things and push my self out of my comfort zone. Without this philosophy, I never would have learned many of the techniques I know today.

As much as I feel this quote applies to arts such as knitting, drawing, painting, and sculpting I believe its definition of art can be taken a step further. What if we use this quote as a catalyst to never be content with our role in the world and humanity? If we were to apply this to our jobs, academics, leadership roles, and other community interactions I believe that it could take us a thousand miles. For example, I don’t ever want to be content with the way I am serving my community. I always want to be seeking out rising needs and holes that need to be filled. Just because I have found my “niche” to serve does not mean that I should view the community service vacancy in my life as fulfilled.

I want to encourage you all to constantly be looking for new ways to force yourself into the secrets of life. If you are forever willing to be curious and constantly learn then your life will become richer than ever imaginable.

-Kenz 

Wind

Flying with my brother on New Years Day 2012.

My dad flying at Jockey's Ridge, NC.

Recovering the kite from a dive.

I love wind. Most people complain when it's windy, but it is becoming one of my favorite weather forecasts. I'm not really sure when this all started. I'm pretty sure that I haven't always loved wind, but I've never hated it either. I do know that when I was a child I was pretty apathetic about wind. I never gave it much thought one way or the other.

Whenever my family would go to the beach when I was growing up, my dad would bring his bag of kites. He had a wonderful collection of kites. He had 1 string kites that were fun shapes, two string kites, and even 4 string kites. I would help him fly them each summer at the beach because it provided a wonderfully steady sea breeze but that was pretty much the only time of year that I would fly.

A few years ago I caught onto the passion that my dad has always about towards kites. I've always wanted to be able to fly (you know, the whole wishing you had wings and could soar and whatnot) and flying trick kites is the closest I can get to that without doing something ridiculous like base jumping. When I fly a kite I feel so peaceful and relaxed. I think that my growing love for flying kites has been the cause for my love of wind. The most obvious and most important requirement for flying a kite is that you have a breeze. I truly believe that this is the reason that I have come to love wind so much.

Whether it is warm or cold, when I feel wind I am reminded of God. When wind wraps all around my body it is inescapable. Its like I can tangibly feel God's love and God's presence all around me. Wind represents to me God's strength, omnipotence, and omnipresence. Every time I feel a strong breeze I am reminded of God and feel comforted to know that he is on my side.

Bold

Today started out just like any other day. I went to community event with my roommate to get a nice breakfast and was planning on spending the rest of the day preparing for exams. Shortly after I arrived back to my dorm room, I started hearing unwelcome sounds out my window and receiving text messages from Virginia Tech and my friends on campus. A day that I had planned out went horribly astray from what it should have been. One minute, it was just another day on campus, and the next minute it turned into a day that many Hokies will never forget. December 8th, 2011.

This concept of everything suddenly changing shouldn't be anything new to us. Sadly, it happens quite frequently. National tragedies, natural disasters, loved ones passing away, unexplainable deaths, and changes in plans. They are all unforeseeable events that have a tendency to change everything in our lives. The thing is that we can't usually see these things coming and they come at us like a punch in the face. 

Through the course of events yesterday, I felt a community pull together. There were no gaps, but instead we were a united community. It is powerful when you are receiving so many texts messages that your phone doesn't even have a chance to send another one. It is powerful when people who you seldom speak to sincerely ask if you are okay and tell you they care. It is powerful when you finally hear from those that you have been trying to check up on to make sure that they are okay. 

I realized how much I value the relationships I have with people in my life. I feel like it is impossible to return the amount of love i was given from everyone yesterday, but I want to try. I want to show people that I care about them too. I want to be there for them in their moment of weakness, sadness, strength, and joy. I want to be proactive is showing people that I care about them.

We shouldn't let things in our life cause us to live in fear. Instead, they should encourage us to be bold. We should be bold with our loved ones and tell them how much they mean to us. We should be bold with those who are strangers because you never know how bad of a day they might be having. Our world needs more people who aren't afraid to stand up for what they know is right, even if it comes at a price. I want to try to be one of those people and I invite you to join me.

I couldn't help but think of Beautiful Things by Gungor. Below are some of the lyrics:

All this pain
I wonder if I’ll ever find my way
I wonder if my life could really change at all
All this earth
Could all that is lost ever be found
Could a garden come up from this ground at all

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

Life

Here is a beautiful picture that I found today. I have been staring at it for the past 5 minutes. I think it is so powerful because it has the ability to showcase an entire lifespan in four simple images. 

It is painful 

beautiful

timeless

relatable

symbolic

cyclic

spiritual

I think that it represents the passing of times, the changing of seasons, and the growth of someone (or multiple peoples) throughout a lifetime. If you notice the trees in the image, as one is maturing and then dying, the other one is acquiring new growth and finally reaching its maturity. In the final frame, dead tree is springing up a new sprout and continuing the circle of life.

The final thing that I noticed in this image is the importance of the birds. 

After the girl enters his life, there is only one bird remaining in the sky. The couple is separated from the bird because they are limited to only being on the ground.

In the final frame after both of them pass away, there are no birds in the sky because all three of them have been united in heaven and there is nothing that is separating them from each other. The three of them are finally able to be together.

I have only pointed out a few of my observations from this image. I challenge you to absorb it and see what other meaning you can pull from it. I would love to hear what you come up with. 

As I watch the leaves fall off the tree, 

Mackenzie

White Space

Over winter break my Bel Air church, Mountain Christian Church, did a series around christmas time titled "I'm Dreaming of a White Space Christmas". Here's a short video that illustrates the concept quite well. PLEASE watch it!

http://vimeo.com/17489321

Basically, the concept behind the series was for us to leave some white space in our lives. You know, like the white space, or margin, on the edges of the pages in a book. If the text was to go all the way to the edge of the page, it would look cluttered and no one would want to read it. Just like there's a spacious margin right here on this blog. The text is only consuming a narrow strip of the entire page because it makes it look more appealing to you. It's obviously working because your reading what I'm writing aren't you? The same thing goes for our lives. If we have every little detail of our day rigidly planned out, how in the world are we going to let God implement his plan for our life? The more open space we have in our day to day life, the more room there is for God to work out his perfect plan for us.

Well, at the time of hearing this sermon series I didn't really think about it much. It was over Christmas break so I didn't have much going on anyway. I just thought to myself, "White Space? Check!" Now that I am back at school and getting into the swing of things, I am getting a lesson on the importance of white space.

My schedule is pretty open right now. My only assignments have been text book readings, and things really haven't gotten intense yet like i know they will later on in the semester. I am not going into details in this post because things are still beginning to play out, but I definitely will soon. For now, I just wanted to say that having white space in your life really does allow room for God to work!!!

There have been a couple different extracurricular activities that I have been offered to partake in, but because I was not passionate about them I let them pass by. These are things that I probably would have enjoyed but I knew they weren't supposed to be a part of my life at the present moment. All I can say is: Boy am I glad I have had an open schedule right now because God is most definitely using it to his advantage! I can't wait to share specifics about things. for now I just want to encourage you to create white space in your life! It will be 300% worth it! I challenge you to have done something to create white space in your life by the time I post my next blog. I know you can do it and I know you know what you need to do. What are you waiting for? Do it!

Much love from a Hokie

-Kenz